I know you guys have been wondering where I’ve been. I’ve searched to find the love within. ROTFLMAO. OK, no more corny song lines. Actually, I have been in Baltimore all week. It was my first official duty for my new gig as a consultant. Because of that trip, I have lots and lots to rant on. I’ll try to keep it brief. If I can’t do that, then I’ll break this up into several posts.
First of all, let the record show that until April 20th, I had not flown since I accompanied my friend Cyd to the BEA in Chicago in June of 2004. Some thangs have changed since that time. LOL. And the older a sista gets, the more nervous a flyer she has become. You can officially call me the Armrest Gripper. I ain’t shamed! LOL. I’m sure this will get better as I fly more regularly. Flying is not for people with control issues (namely me), but what can you do?
Now, before I get to ranting about Baltimore, I have to say a few things.
I realize that I have become a Southern snob. I never thought I would be able to say that about myself. But alas, it is so true. First of all, let me acknowledge that the south has it’s myriad of issues. Racism, sexism, high mortality rate, poor public education, high HIV infection rates, low wages, the list goes on and on and on. So, I know from whence I come. Overall though, we are some cordial folks. You expect everyone to look you in the eye and say good morning when you walk into Starbucks or say hello when you make eye contact at all. Not so, when you get north of Richmond, VA.
I’m just saying, the folks in Baltimore are not the most pleasant people on the planet. The minute I got off the plane in BWI, I could feel the freeze, and it had nothing to do with the temperature outside or the air conditioning inside. Folks just looked mean and unhappy. And this included the white people. I chalked it up to arriving on a really bad weather day- they had horrible thunderstorms and lightening strikes prior to our arrival. Nope, as the week wore on, I realized that they are just that way.
A side note: I swear I saw the gender-bending little gangster girl/hit-person from The Wire that got capped by the high school kid before he headed out of town. Oh, by the way. She didn’t look happy either. She looked just like she did on tv. Maybe I should get out more.
Now, it is at this point that I need to complain about my hotel. Let me set the scene. The Marriott Renaissance Hotel on Platt St. (oh yes, I’m going to call them out). A lovely, lovely facility. I couldn’t have asked for a nicer place. But for the costs of 229.00 a night Sunday and Monday, and 339.00 a night Tuesday and Wednesday (I never got a good explanation for the rate increase, but since it was pre-paid by the folks who hired me, I couldn’t say much) why in the fuck would a sista have to pay 9.95 for Internet access? A DAY!!!!! You know that shit pissed me off. I can go to the DoubleTree,the Hilton,the Sheraton, any Comfort Inn, or Motel 6 and not pay for wi-fi services. And these gus charge WAY less a night, so why in the hell would I pay folks who are LITERALLY making bank 9.95 a day for Internet access? To make matters worse, no one was able to access free Wi-fi while IN the hotel. Can you say blocking signals!!? Ain’t that some shit? And they had a ton on conferences going on. You can’t tell me they are hurting that bad that they needed to milk us weary travelers out of ten bucks a day. It’s a fucking conspiracy, I tell ya! My protest for the week was no hotel Internet access. I used my Blackberry instead as an official protest. Until I had to pay them 3.00 to print out my return flight info due to changes. The fuckers got me. I was pissed.
I have so much more I want to write about, like how much I think I am going to love this self-employment thing. And how my invisible force field is no longer working because people keep talking to me when I am reading, or like right now, while I’m typing. That shit sucks. I’m in Newark and I’m just waiting for my connection to my beloved ChuckTown.
I’ve got to weigh in this weekend on the Pennsylvania primary and the theory that working class white males won’t vote for Barack. I’ve got to talk about the local news in Baltimore. Now I see why those folks are so pissed off- nothing but rape, murder, drug use, and car accidents. Damn, don’t folks do anything positive in B’More?
In other words, the Southern Diva is back with a vengeance, and after May 2nd, it’s really going to be on and popping. I’m going to wrap it up because we are about to start boarding. I’ve missed ya’ll mucho. Holla at a diva when you get a chance.
Friday, April 25, 2008
Wednesday, April 16, 2008
Creativity...
Can be a biyatch! There are times when I feel like I am constantly seeking my muse. I want and need it, like a Calgon moment,and yet it seems to dry up and wither. And then there are times when I am so busy I don't know if I am coming or going and the channels to my muse open up and I get hit with a tidal wave of ideas and don't know where to start. These days,I swear, I have ideas coming at me left and right. It's like something inside my mind and my soul has been freed up and all that I was seeking has decided to make its presence known- RIGHT NOW. And I just need two more weeks to clear my plate so that I can dive in.
Except it doesn't work that way in real life. I know that two weeks from now when I sit down and open myself up completely I'll get nothing. And I won't be able to remember all the things that were competing for my time and attention a few weeks ago.
So, I am resorting to list making and journaling to keep myself on track. My creative "to do" list is getting long, and I am very excited about that. I am trying to finish up my "busy" work with the man, so that I can get to my "real" work.
I have always believed in the law of attraction, but didn't see how it was manifesting in my life. That's because I was expending so much energy dealing with bullshit that I was attracting more bullshit. Now that my focus and energy are on positive, self-fulfilling tasks, I am attracting things that are positive and self-fulfilling. Ain't that something. LOL
Except it doesn't work that way in real life. I know that two weeks from now when I sit down and open myself up completely I'll get nothing. And I won't be able to remember all the things that were competing for my time and attention a few weeks ago.
So, I am resorting to list making and journaling to keep myself on track. My creative "to do" list is getting long, and I am very excited about that. I am trying to finish up my "busy" work with the man, so that I can get to my "real" work.
I have always believed in the law of attraction, but didn't see how it was manifesting in my life. That's because I was expending so much energy dealing with bullshit that I was attracting more bullshit. Now that my focus and energy are on positive, self-fulfilling tasks, I am attracting things that are positive and self-fulfilling. Ain't that something. LOL
Tuesday, April 15, 2008
Hogwash
So, I find the video Church of Oprah Exposed on YouTube and MichaelBaisden.com. It's a bunch of bull. She is simply espousing that there is more than one way to God. I can't stand the intolerance and bigotry that people advocate under the guise of "religion". I won't be posting that video here- my blog, my rules. No religious intolerance allowed. Even if I don't understand or believe your tenents, I respect your right to have them. Just don't try to convert me and we will be fine.
Oprah issue down, Obama and Smiley to go. LOL
Oprah issue down, Obama and Smiley to go. LOL
Church of Oprah video
OK, I haven't found the video that Michael Baisden was talking about yet, but I found this on YouTube and it cracked me the hell up. Just wait for the tempo to speed up.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JT6w6k3vwuw
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JT6w6k3vwuw
What's Going on Ya'll?
I have been so busy trying to get up off the plantation and get my home office up and running that I have no freakin' idea what is going on.
This is what I know and need to research:
Tavis Smiley is leaving the Tom Joyner Morning Show. I am not even going to print the hundred and one thoughts going through my head about this. I guess his Big Boy pills are no longer doing the job. ROTFLMAO- I crack myself up.
Barack Obama is pissing folks off because he told the truth and said that the working class in Pennsylvania turn to their guns and God in order to find solace because of the current state off affairs in our country. Gotta go check out the whole thing to figure out how that statement is elitist. It ain't only the folks in PA who are pissed off and bitter. More on this after I scour the net.
But what has really got me is some comment Oprah allegedly made about us all being gods. I am leaving here to google. Apparently the Christian conservatives are up in arms (what else is new). It amazes me the things that people get upset and/or pissed off about. I thought we had freedom of speech and religion in this country. So let me get this straight, a Skinhead can spew all manner of hate and filth, and folks hardly blink or attribute it to a "radical" group of outsiders, and Oprah says we are all gods and people get up in arms. I'm just saying. Doesn't make sense to me. I can't speak too much on it until I read the transcripts or see the video for myself. Heading over to YouTube.
If there's anything else I need to check out, please let me know. Maybe I should apply for the position soon to be vacated by Mr. Smiley. I've got opinions out the ass. LOL.
HOLLA!
This is what I know and need to research:
Tavis Smiley is leaving the Tom Joyner Morning Show. I am not even going to print the hundred and one thoughts going through my head about this. I guess his Big Boy pills are no longer doing the job. ROTFLMAO- I crack myself up.
Barack Obama is pissing folks off because he told the truth and said that the working class in Pennsylvania turn to their guns and God in order to find solace because of the current state off affairs in our country. Gotta go check out the whole thing to figure out how that statement is elitist. It ain't only the folks in PA who are pissed off and bitter. More on this after I scour the net.
But what has really got me is some comment Oprah allegedly made about us all being gods. I am leaving here to google. Apparently the Christian conservatives are up in arms (what else is new). It amazes me the things that people get upset and/or pissed off about. I thought we had freedom of speech and religion in this country. So let me get this straight, a Skinhead can spew all manner of hate and filth, and folks hardly blink or attribute it to a "radical" group of outsiders, and Oprah says we are all gods and people get up in arms. I'm just saying. Doesn't make sense to me. I can't speak too much on it until I read the transcripts or see the video for myself. Heading over to YouTube.
If there's anything else I need to check out, please let me know. Maybe I should apply for the position soon to be vacated by Mr. Smiley. I've got opinions out the ass. LOL.
HOLLA!
Friday, April 11, 2008
Working From Home
While it has been my dream for years to get out of the rat race, work for myself, live life on my own terms, etc. I can't say that I had it all planned out in my head. Now, don't get me wrong, I mean, I had what I would do planned out, but I didn't have the day to day planned out.
For instance, I need office space. A place for the computer, printer, fax, files, cork boards, etc. I have a spare bedroom that currently houses DIT's computer and a whole lot of junk that needs to go to Goodwill, and provides respite to visitors on rare occasions. It looks like a hurricane blew threw it (because my child has more clothes than any 13 year ever should).
And so, this weekend, we (me, The Man, and DIT) will be cleaning the guest room so that I can get my office set up. I am so excited. But the closer I get to working from home, the more I realize how disciplined I will have to be.
I have to have a daily work plan once the office is ready.
No surfing the net for hours.
No watching The View in my pajamas while eating yogurt and granola.
No hours and hours of reading.
No snacking every five minutes.
No long email and phone conversations with my girlfriends.
No runs to Starbucks or Paneras or Atlanta Bread Company. (OK-maybe fewer runs)
No two hour lunches.
No staring out the window and daydreaming.
I could stay on the J-O-B if I want to do all that (except for The View and the reading).
Seriously, though. I know I am going to have to be organized and maintain some sort of schedule to ensure that I reach my goals. In the words of my great-grandmother, Daisy Palmer: "some folks are just free 'til dey fool" meaning, some folks have so much freedom they don't know what to do with themselves. Ya'll know, that ain't me.
From now on, it's all about the hustle, Baby! And I'm about to get mine on.
For instance, I need office space. A place for the computer, printer, fax, files, cork boards, etc. I have a spare bedroom that currently houses DIT's computer and a whole lot of junk that needs to go to Goodwill, and provides respite to visitors on rare occasions. It looks like a hurricane blew threw it (because my child has more clothes than any 13 year ever should).
And so, this weekend, we (me, The Man, and DIT) will be cleaning the guest room so that I can get my office set up. I am so excited. But the closer I get to working from home, the more I realize how disciplined I will have to be.
I have to have a daily work plan once the office is ready.
No surfing the net for hours.
No watching The View in my pajamas while eating yogurt and granola.
No hours and hours of reading.
No snacking every five minutes.
No long email and phone conversations with my girlfriends.
No runs to Starbucks or Paneras or Atlanta Bread Company. (OK-maybe fewer runs)
No two hour lunches.
No staring out the window and daydreaming.
I could stay on the J-O-B if I want to do all that (except for The View and the reading).
Seriously, though. I know I am going to have to be organized and maintain some sort of schedule to ensure that I reach my goals. In the words of my great-grandmother, Daisy Palmer: "some folks are just free 'til dey fool" meaning, some folks have so much freedom they don't know what to do with themselves. Ya'll know, that ain't me.
From now on, it's all about the hustle, Baby! And I'm about to get mine on.
Tuesday, April 8, 2008
In Anticipation of Emancipation
I am really looking forward to leaving the plantation. I want nothing more than to already be knee-deep in the next phase of my professional life. I am primed and ready to go. Except for one thing. I've got to finish out my jail time.
A word to the wise: NEVER, NEVER, NEVER give an employer more than two weeks notice. It's just a set up. Folks think they can get you to wrap everything up in a nice, neat little package so that they will have no worries when you are gone. Also, employees start behaving like a graduate from the Machiavellian School of Business. It's all about what they can get for themselves. Let me be an example so that you don't have to experience anything akin to what I am going through. Keep it short and sweet. Two weeks and be out.
Since I have the rest of this month to complain about the job that is soon to be over, I thought I should start taking steps to prepare for self-employment. So Gadget Ho went and bought a new laptop. (Shut up- it's a business expense and I can write it off on my taxes. LOL). It's a nice computer. No big bells or whistles. I just need the internet and a word processing program for my writing.
So last night, I decide that I need to go ahead and move my iTunes from my daughter's computer to my new computer. Got some directions off the Internet. It looks like a breeze. It wasn't! After two fucking hours, I did manage to get the iTunes on my computer to recognize my iPod and so I didn't have to go through the process of making those two match up. But there are 1000 songs on my daughter's computer that are still there. I couldn't get that thing to pull in the music no matter what I did. So, after cursing, I simply started loading up cds. I know, I know. It will take me weeks to get all my music on that damn thing.
In the meantime, I've threatened DIT with bodily harm if she deletes all my music before I get a chance to get my purchased songs, etc off her computer. I probably should have told her transfer the music. It would have been done in a few minutes.
I said I was a gadget ho. I didn't say I wasn't technologically challenged.
Looks like I'll be holding on to my old school agenda/organizer for a while. LOL
A word to the wise: NEVER, NEVER, NEVER give an employer more than two weeks notice. It's just a set up. Folks think they can get you to wrap everything up in a nice, neat little package so that they will have no worries when you are gone. Also, employees start behaving like a graduate from the Machiavellian School of Business. It's all about what they can get for themselves. Let me be an example so that you don't have to experience anything akin to what I am going through. Keep it short and sweet. Two weeks and be out.
Since I have the rest of this month to complain about the job that is soon to be over, I thought I should start taking steps to prepare for self-employment. So Gadget Ho went and bought a new laptop. (Shut up- it's a business expense and I can write it off on my taxes. LOL). It's a nice computer. No big bells or whistles. I just need the internet and a word processing program for my writing.
So last night, I decide that I need to go ahead and move my iTunes from my daughter's computer to my new computer. Got some directions off the Internet. It looks like a breeze. It wasn't! After two fucking hours, I did manage to get the iTunes on my computer to recognize my iPod and so I didn't have to go through the process of making those two match up. But there are 1000 songs on my daughter's computer that are still there. I couldn't get that thing to pull in the music no matter what I did. So, after cursing, I simply started loading up cds. I know, I know. It will take me weeks to get all my music on that damn thing.
In the meantime, I've threatened DIT with bodily harm if she deletes all my music before I get a chance to get my purchased songs, etc off her computer. I probably should have told her transfer the music. It would have been done in a few minutes.
I said I was a gadget ho. I didn't say I wasn't technologically challenged.
Looks like I'll be holding on to my old school agenda/organizer for a while. LOL
Friday, April 4, 2008
Friday Morning Jams
After the week I had, I really need 'em. Eminem, Jill Scott, Mary J. They are all here with me.
And speaking of music, in case you've been under a rock, Leona Lewis, the young Brit being compared to Whitney, Mariah, AND Celine, will have her debut cd in stores on Tuesday April 8th. I am really looking forward to it (as well as DIT).
I love it when I discover an artist- even if they've been around forever. LOL
If you were to scroll through my iPod, you would be amazed. I've got some of everything. From Al Green to John Mayer to Boyz II Men to Nickelback to Kenny Loggins to Elton John to Yolanda Adams. I love folks who can sing. And their song has to speak to me.
Fridays have traditionally been music days for me. You know, the last day of the week- you need that juice to get you going, and sometimes keep you going throughout the day. And then by the end of the day, you need some uptempo jams to help you celebrate making it through the week. Which gets you primed and ready to enjoy your weekend.
If you can, turn on your radio, pull out your iPod, or slip a cd into your computer and jam your way thru the day. You'll be glad you did.
What are you listening to today? Holla back! (Hmmmm- let me go find some Gwen Stefani. LOL)
And speaking of music, in case you've been under a rock, Leona Lewis, the young Brit being compared to Whitney, Mariah, AND Celine, will have her debut cd in stores on Tuesday April 8th. I am really looking forward to it (as well as DIT).
I love it when I discover an artist- even if they've been around forever. LOL
If you were to scroll through my iPod, you would be amazed. I've got some of everything. From Al Green to John Mayer to Boyz II Men to Nickelback to Kenny Loggins to Elton John to Yolanda Adams. I love folks who can sing. And their song has to speak to me.
Fridays have traditionally been music days for me. You know, the last day of the week- you need that juice to get you going, and sometimes keep you going throughout the day. And then by the end of the day, you need some uptempo jams to help you celebrate making it through the week. Which gets you primed and ready to enjoy your weekend.
If you can, turn on your radio, pull out your iPod, or slip a cd into your computer and jam your way thru the day. You'll be glad you did.
What are you listening to today? Holla back! (Hmmmm- let me go find some Gwen Stefani. LOL)
Wednesday, April 2, 2008
The Best Laid Plans
often go awry.
Ya'll will not believe the drama I have experienced since giving my notice. Really, you wouldn't believe it. I'm in the middle of it and I don't believe it.
On top of that, I'm in the middle of a "something" with a close friend. I really want to talk about the issue, and she is not in a place to do so. While I totally understand, it is frustrating because I want to get all the cards on the table and deal with the issue so that we can move beyond that. And she is not ready to do that. Which shows me how frustrating I've been to other people in my life at various times. I often need time to "process" things through my personal filters before I can address them with someone else. So, I wait.
And it's funny, because another friend asked me this afternoon when did maintaining good friendships become so hard? What happened to mad at you one minute, sharing fries and giggling the next? Oh yeah, I think I was thirteen then. LOL. But seriously, when did just being yourself start to get in the way of being friends? Or is it just me and my friends? (Michael, you are not allowed to answer that- lol). Do we have less tolerance when we get older? I know for me, I let things build up to a breaking point and then I want to address it all at once. Not so good. Folks often forget why they did or said something, the emotion or intention behind it, or even actually doing or saying it. While I've been carrying it since the day it happened. And I know better- you know, being a mental health professional and all. LOL.
Not hard to tell where my head is today.
I'm getting back to where I started.
I planned on a smooth transition to the next phase in my professional life. What I got was other people's shit flung at me. Everyone has their idea of what I should do and I began listening to the voices in my attempt to people please under the guise of being professional. I didn't work for me. Suffice it to say, I should be excited about my new gig and my life going in a different direction, and instead I am dealing with drama. Don't worry. I have an escape plan. Actually, I have several. :-)
Holla at me and let me know how your friendships are going.
Ya'll will not believe the drama I have experienced since giving my notice. Really, you wouldn't believe it. I'm in the middle of it and I don't believe it.
On top of that, I'm in the middle of a "something" with a close friend. I really want to talk about the issue, and she is not in a place to do so. While I totally understand, it is frustrating because I want to get all the cards on the table and deal with the issue so that we can move beyond that. And she is not ready to do that. Which shows me how frustrating I've been to other people in my life at various times. I often need time to "process" things through my personal filters before I can address them with someone else. So, I wait.
And it's funny, because another friend asked me this afternoon when did maintaining good friendships become so hard? What happened to mad at you one minute, sharing fries and giggling the next? Oh yeah, I think I was thirteen then. LOL. But seriously, when did just being yourself start to get in the way of being friends? Or is it just me and my friends? (Michael, you are not allowed to answer that- lol). Do we have less tolerance when we get older? I know for me, I let things build up to a breaking point and then I want to address it all at once. Not so good. Folks often forget why they did or said something, the emotion or intention behind it, or even actually doing or saying it. While I've been carrying it since the day it happened. And I know better- you know, being a mental health professional and all. LOL.
Not hard to tell where my head is today.
I'm getting back to where I started.
I planned on a smooth transition to the next phase in my professional life. What I got was other people's shit flung at me. Everyone has their idea of what I should do and I began listening to the voices in my attempt to people please under the guise of being professional. I didn't work for me. Suffice it to say, I should be excited about my new gig and my life going in a different direction, and instead I am dealing with drama. Don't worry. I have an escape plan. Actually, I have several. :-)
Holla at me and let me know how your friendships are going.
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